Purpose

I often think about my purpose. It is talked about as one of the most fundamental aspects in living a more fulfilling life, and based on just how frequently it shows up, I can’t disagree.

Friedrich Nietzsche is quoted as writing, “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how”. This was later used by Viktor Frankl in his book, Man’s Search for Meaning. And even more importantly (because it is one of my favourite books) Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi concluded in Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, that they key in inducing flow for your entire life was to live with a purpose beyond yourself.

Purpose, therefore is a compass, or a light in the dark, which can guide us through our lives. It can help us when we feel stuck and it can give us a reason to keep moving forward. It can also help us to decide what to do, which is often the reason why so many people feel helpless or lost in life - they simply don’t know what to do.

It always begs the question as to what is my purpose? How do I discover my purpose? Surely if I knew my purpose, I could dedicate my life to something, and I would no longer feel as though I was walking aimlessly into the night.

People make a living on trying to tell you how to figure out your purpose. They will sell you a guide, or sell you a show, and if you just follow the steps… pure enlightenment.

What I have come to learn about purpose, is that it’s very rarely something you can put into words. It’s so often a feeling, or something deep inside you. It most regularly appears when we aren’t aligned with our purpose, it’s that feeling of knowing that where we are or what we’re doing, just is not where we’re supposed to be.

But even so, even if we are able to listen to that thing deep inside of ourselves that we’re able to decipher even the generality of our purpose; how much meaning can we give to it?

I have many times come close to feeling aligned with a purpose. Even now, writing this post, I would be able to verbalise a meaning of sorts, that would be enough to give me purpose and direction.

I should be happy, yes. And sometimes I am filled with a sense of clarity that I truly feel as though I have a why to live; and I feel that I am confident in what I should be doing because I have that why to guide me.

But, my brain is cynical and so I am not happy, and I’m not satisfied with the idea of having an ingrained purpose, something that comes straight from your soul. That’s not to say that I disagree with the premise; there are times when I can feel it inside of me. I know when I’m not on the right path, and I know when I feel aligned with what I am supposed to be doing. That it undeniable.

My quandary comes from where that purpose comes from.

Firstly, if our purpose comes from deep within, is our purpose, as we see and feel it, a product of our lives lived to that point? In the same way that one’s upbringing shapes what we need from the world, does it therefore shape what we feel we should be doing?

I think of athletes who have an unrelenting desire to push themselves. When shaped in a sporting sense and when success is the context, this drive is seen as a positive. When seen in the context of a failing relationship, or a life falling apart, such a desire can be interpreted as a need for approval or a deep insecurity that one is not good enough as they are.

That’s not to say both cannot co-exist. The basis for Maegenki is of course that duality - one can acknowledge and have the understanding that one is good enough right now and always, whilst also having the fire within to explore and reach their potential. Nevertheless, the point still stands.

And so in the same way, if someone’s purpose is to bring joy to the world, what does it say about them as a person and their past life? Does it say that they have a deep meaning that comes from their soul to be a beacon to the world and to bring smiles and happiness to all around them? Or perhaps there is something that means that they know what it feels like to miss that joy in their life, and so what they feel would be best service to society would be someone who brings that joy so no one can feel like they once did?

It is a reflection, of course, and a cynical one at that. It also begs the question - so what? A purpose is a purpose, irrespective of the true origin.

Which leads me to my second point; can we accept purpose as an altruistically good thing, or is there an aspect of selfishness?

Alan Watts used to argue that everything we do we for ourselves. Even acts perceived as unselfish or altruistic are ultimately driven by the self’s desires.

If my purpose is to be a guiding light for others and to lead by example so that people can feel emboldened to pursue themselves and to recognise the light within themselves, he would perhaps argue that it stems from a desire to achieve a certain self-image or to be seen as powerful or morally superior. His reasoning related to the very aspect of “self”, in which he argued does not exist as it implies the self is separate from the universe.

I will admit, it is something that causes me to stop and think. It is a difficult concept, but also one that allows me to think more about myself. Watt’s argument relates more specifically to self-improvement, but the argument clearly can apply to other chains of thought. The differentiating factor, I guess, does align with his wider world view.

The purpose from earlier, for example, would not be self-improvement for self-improvement’s sake; to dedicate my life in the pursuit of improving myself and acting as a guiding light for others, is in itself a direct acknowledgment that the self and the world are not separate. It could be argued that it is in fact very much improving the world by improving oneself, which hits the heart of Watt’s thinking.

The final question I am left with is, does it matter?

Some would argue that our purpose is a message from our soul. Some would argue that we can create our own purpose by simply deciding what we want it to be. Perhaps there is truth in both perspectives; what it ultimately leads me to believe is that we spend too much time thinking about what our purpose could be, and not enough time living it, or living in general. Having a why does help the how. It is undeniable that having a purpose in life helps to guide you and to give meaning to everything you do.

But, I would argue that it is more important to live with purpose.

Maybe we do all have a pre-determined purpose.

Maybe what we feel is our purpose, is actually determined by our upbringing.

Maybe we can simply decide what our purpose is.

Maybe what we feel is our purpose is inherently selfish and self-serving.

Despite all the maybes, perhaps the most important thing is that we don’t forget to live. A duck does not sit and wonder its purpose, neither does a cloud, or a wave, or a ray of light. If you want a purpose, then live a life of happiness in the moment, live with unrelenting joy that you, right now, are perfect and exactly what the world needs you to be, live with so much authentic energy that people are encouraged to do the same. Live with the knowledge that a ray of light does not ponder its place in the universe but it will still guide you and warm you.